Tag: mental illnesses

How to deal with depression

This surely is a difficult topic, but I find it extremely important to spread knowledge about it. In this article, we’ll explore strategies to deal with the most common of mental illnesses.

To know more about depression itself, read this article which I previously wrote about symptoms, definition and perception of depression in our society.

This is a little guide in ten steps on how to deal with an enemy as depression:

  • Reach out for help. This is really important: don’t try to overcome depression by yourself. You deserve help and acceptance. Get into therapy, look for a good psychologist and talk to them about your problem. Talking to someone who’s there to listen to you is the first step to heal.
  • Forgive yourself. You weren’t able to get that mark you wanted because you felt too exhausted to study. You know what? That’s ok. Your mental health comes before your grades, before your job, before standards.
  • Rest when you need to. You see your friends partying all the time and your collegues working so hard, while you can’t help but sleep. That’s fine, you’re fighting a hard battle, fighting depression asks for a lot of energy.
  • Don’t force yourself. If you don’t feel like going out today, it’s okay. You don’t have to prove shit to anyone, take your rest.
  • Remember that a bad moment shouldn’t ruin your whole day. If you lay in bed for three hours, that doesn’t mean you cannot grab your coat and go for a walk now. Remember that you are in control of your time.
  • Look for activities that bring you pleasure. It happens, at times, that what we enjoyed before depression doen’t seem that cool anymore now. That’s ok, we’re individuals that are made to move, to change. Try out new stuff, and spend time doing what you love. Here you can find a list of activities worth trying.
  • Apply the previous point to sex. If you’re sexually active, but don’t find pleasure in sex anymore, that’s also ok. You don’t have to force yourself into something you don’t feel like doing. Talk to your partner and look for new romantic activities to do together with them.
  • Reward yourself. Recovering from depression is like training to win a marathon: reward yourself for every extra mile.
  • Whenever you feel down, make lists of your qualities. Try writing a list of the things you’re capable of and pointing out at least ten qualities. Write another list and point out what you were able to achieve in your life and are proud of. Write a third list and add your goals for the future. Remember yourself why you want them so bad.
  • Remember you worth. You’re strong, brave and deserve the world. You will overcome this, reach your goals and have the life of your dreams. Don’t give up.

How to treat people with mental illnesses

The purpose of this article is to help spread knowledge and acceptance towards mental illnesses and how to react to them. Too often, in fact, we don’t know how to react to people with depression or anxiety, and end up both making our friends feel uncomfortable and feeling weird ourselves.

Let’s make it clear, as a beginning, that there are a lot of different mental illnesses and that every person has their own way of feeling, and, as a consequence, even if we have had experiences with mental illnesses, we should never feel entitled to judge someone.

Here are some tips on how to act with people going through something rough:

  • Don’t judge. I don’t care if you had depression yourself, if you’re a cancer survivor or if you think you’ve had it worse. People are different and react differently, never ever should you feel entitled to judge someone you know nothing about.
  • Be open and listen if they need to talk. At times, the simple act of listening to them can make people feel valued and loved. You never know how important it can be for someone to just have a friend’s comprehension.
  • Don’t give advice if they don’t ask you for it. I know this may look like a weird suggestion, but most people with mental illnesses know what they should be doing, they just don’t have the energy to do it. Do not ever say anything like: “You just need to eat”, or “You would get over this if you went outside more often”: it’s extremely painful to hear something like that, believe me.
  • Do not belittle the problem, no matter how little it looks to you. You’re not them, remember it.
  • Don’t point out what’s worse. Some people automatically do it: when they hear of someone’s problems, they feel the need to point out that there are worse situations. Ever heard anything like: “Come on, there are literally people out there dying because they cannot get access to food”? Yeah, same. This is toxic, remember it and avoid it.
  • Do not force people into doing things they don’t feel like doing. It’s nice to be propositive, but if the answer is no, don’t try to change it. This surely has some exceptions, in particular when trying to help someone get into therapy, however, let’s make it clear that forcing your anorexic friend to eat that slice of pizza will only make the situation worse.
  • Suggest them to see a psychologist. Don’t force them into doing it, but point out the positive aspects of such a decision and be supportive if they decide to go for it. Say that you can go with them the first few times if they need to, or offer your help with calling and getting there.
  • Check on your friends once in a while. We all have a busy life, but, if you don’t find time for your friends, can you really call them so? Try to check more often on those friends of yours whose behaviour looks so weird lately, and make sure they know they can always count on you.
  • Remember not to be too present. It’s really nice if you decide to help people who need it, but don’t jump into their lives at any possible moment. Remember people need their privacy and their time alone: understand it and act consequentely.
  • Remeber about yourself. Don’t let all your energy sink into a toxic behaviour: it’s good to help, anyway, if you feel like you’re getting too involved, remember to take a step back and care about yourself.