What you actually need in life

I’ve been really inactive lately, but I’ve been super busy with UNI, life and self care. By the way, I’m back, and, if there’s something that the beginning of UNI and the last months have taught me, it’s what you actually need in your life.

I know that a lot of you will be tempted to answer “love” to this, but, you know, most of the time the love of your life has little to do with your own happiness. Watch out: I’m not saying that relationships are useless or that you cannot find happiness in them, what I’m saying is that there’s more to life than romantic love. This is my ultimate list in five steps of what it takes to build a healthy, fulfilled life.

  • Self love. Self love and self acceptance are the keys to happiness. No one was born perfect, but it’s up to us to understand how fantastic we are. Here is a post that can help you with getting better at accepting yourself.
  • Mutual respect in relationships. No matter if you’re talking about a romantic relationship or a friendship: respect is a necessity when it comes to the way we treat people or we’re being treated by them. Respect comes in different forms: understanding a person’s needs, boundaries and accepting the time they require to grow.
  • Support. This is an absolute need: having someone who’s there for you, no matter what, will make a difference. No wonder you’re a strong, independent person, but we all have our bad days: support is something that does, in fact, make a difference.
  • A dream. Call it how you want: a dream, a purpose in life, a reason to live: you need something that makes you jump out of bed in the morning and gives you enough strenght to get through the day. If you’re struggling with finding your own place in the world, I suggest you read this article.
  • Courage. Life will never be perfect, and not everything will go as planned, but there’s no reason to give up on your dreams. Challenge yourself once more, it takes courage and bravery to get up everyday and start again, but, remember, you can do this: I believe in you, your strenght, you got this!

What else do you think you need to live a happy life? Let us know in the comments below!

10 steps to gain control of your life

This is something that has happened to me a lot: I had dreams, I had goals and I had ideas, but I had no clue how to build my own life and finally take control of my time. Luckily, after a year of preparation and tests, I was selected to go abroad for a year. My routine got broken down and I had to rebuild it all little by little in another country. When coming back to my homecountry, by the way, I had forgotten what my routine looked like before leaving, and, once again, had to find ways to form a new one.

Now, after a lot of meditation on the changes that have turned me into the person I am, one of the things that I underline the most is the interruption of a non-effective routine I had chosen for myself. By it, I don’t mean that we all have to spend a year abroad in order to change our lives, but I’m really convinced that breaking our habits is a great way to start.

Here are the ten most effective steps I took in order to take control of my life and finally achieve my goals:

  • Define your goals. This may look like a stupid start, you’ll probably be questioning yourself on why you’re still reading this article, but what I ask you is to simply take a moment and think about your goals for real. Do you have them all figured out? Can you actually see who you want to become? The reason I decided to start like this is that a lot of people have a vague idea of their goals, but never really took the time to think about them, and, I believe that’s irrelevant to say, you’re not going anywhere if you don’t know where to go.
  • Write your goals down. Different researches show that writing down your goals makes you more likely to accomplish them. I’d like to highlight, anyway, that writing your goals on paper helps you analize them in an objective way and, consequently, decide if you’re willing to spend your time and, often, your money, to achieve them. You can find help on how to write your list of goals here.
  • Do something everyday to get closer to one of your goals. You know what? You’re not going to get where you want by sitting on the couch. You’ll have to work hard and sacrificize something in your life in order to be successful. Tomorrow is already too late, start now.
  • Stop wasting time. I don’t want to make you anxious, but you don’t have plenty of time. If you don’t do what you need to now, you’re going to regret it later. Toxic relationships and a job you hate are, in fact, a waste of time. It can be hard to get out of a toxic relationship, especially when you’re still in love or when you have hundreds of memories with that person (this also applies to friendships). At the same time, it can be hard to quit your job, when you don’t know what the future will look like, but let’s talk about dreams: is this what you have always wanted? Is this the life you were dreaming about? Believe in yourself: you’re a strong individual, you’re going to be alright even out of that relationship. There are plenty of jobs out there waiting for you, apply for a new one. You have the power to change your life: make changes happen.
  • Take care of your body. Your body is as important as your mind, the Latins were right: “mens sana in corpore sano” (a healthy mind in a healthy body). Eat nutritious, clean food, commit to that workout routine, do whatever works for you, but don’t understimate your health. Know your worth.
  • Feed your mind. Your mind needs to be fed just as much as your body needs to. Switch the TV off and read that book. You can find a list of narrative books that will help you see the world with different eyes here.
  • Listen to your soul. You can be the smartest and most beautiful person on earth, but, if you don’t keep your soul green, no flower will grow from it. Take time for yourself, meditate, take a yoga course, heal your wounds. Spend some time alone, listen to yourself: find out who you are and where you are right now.
  • Work on your self confidence. You can find tips on how to improve your self confidence here. Remember that you are the first one who should believe in yourself.
  • Surround yourself with positive people. You have to be in a great environment if you want to have success. Surround yourself with people who believe in you and your choices and are always there to support you. Cut off all the toxic relationships in your life, you don’t have energies to waste.
  • Remeber to rest from time to time. It’s great to work hard, but remember that work isn’t everything: put yourself in the first place and know when it’s time to stop. Challenge yourself, but don’t forget your needs.

7 ways to write effective lists of goals

Do you ever write down a list of goals but get just half of the work done? Keep reading: in this article we’ll find out how to write goals so that you have no other choice but to accomplish them.

I’ve always loved making lists, and, in particular, lists of goals, but somehow I often ended up with so much stuff on a page that crossing off half of it was the best I could do. Lately, some new ideas came to my mind, and actually worked when I tried them out.

  • Divide your goals into urgent and non-urgent ones. Start by listing the ones that you absolutely need to accomplish.
  • Choose three goals from the first category. Don’t fill your days with useless stuff, think and act in a smart way.
  • Select one important goal and get it done. Write it at the top of your page in capslock or in whichever way catches your attention. Remember that this is what you’re going to be the most proud of at the end of the day.
  • Make a list of stuff that you never get done and insert one of these goals everyday into your daily list.
  • Try to figure out how much it will take to accomplish the things you’ve written down at this point and add less important stuff that you can still get done by the end of the day. If you have a job interview, remember that you can find ten minutes to do the washing-up when you get home.
  • Divide the big goals into smaller ones and get every part done on different days.
  • Plan in advance. Remember that you cannot get a hundred things done on the same day. When writing lists, take into account the fact that you’ll probably need to rest a bit during the day and will have to make small changes in order to make the best out of the week.